Loss
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The Dudleys and Gertner cut a long promo before the match that's so tasteless and crass that I don't even know where to begin. If that's what it takes to get heat with these people, come on! Thankfully, they follow it with another good match in this series, though nowhere as good as the TV match. They go all through the crowd again and bleed and up the violent quotient. Balls and Spike win the tag titles in a surprise result. Joey Styles is an idiot and completely telegraphed the finish. Sign Guy throws a couple of tables in the ring and I was waiting the whole match for this - another flaming table spot. You'd think there would be some retribution spot with the Dudleys finally going through flaming tables themselves, but it wasn't to be - Spike goes through one again and they mess up on putting Balls through the table. New Jack shows up and goes after both Dudleys. Well, I guess someone is somehow getting some revenge on them for a change.
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New Jack isn't a completely terrible pick but Bubba Ray Dudley has shown himself to be a strong brawler at various points in his career, and I'm fairly certain Lawler and Tommy Dreamer had my personal favorite ECW match ever at Hardcore Heaven '97.
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A lot of it comes down to managing expectations. They told us early on that the full home video library would be there and it still isn't and they've never explained why. They told us early on there would be the social component and links to merchandise of the people you're watching and that's not there either. Still no explanation. In charging $9.99 a month, instead of giving us greater value for our dollar, they have opted to just make the monthly PPVs mean less. If they had promoted the Network better and more clearly, it would be a different tone. Instead, we'd be impressed that they added the RAWs, Clashes and SNMEs while wondering what was yet to come. But they left too much of the hype to our imaginations instead of being specific, and fans of WWE clearly thought "bigger" than WWE did. I still think they'll get it right eventually. But it's going to take a long time, and it will only get worse before it gets better.
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Semi finals of the tournament from the evening. This match is insane. Lots of brawling and wild bumping into the crowd to get over the high stakes. I guess the incentive to win in a losers advance tournament is that you don't have to put your hair or mask at stake in a subsequent match if you win. This is short, but is in some ways comparable to Doom vs the Horsemen in terms of being shorter than usual great matches, but the perfect length considering the urgency, violence and emotion of the match.
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Fantastic match. This is paced like Michinoku Pro, and there are some incredible high flying moves in this one. I'd call some out but I had some trouble distinguishing who was who. I loved the dive into the rana on the floor and the Shooting Star Press. M-Pro was obviously influenced by lucha libre, and this was CMLL guys letting their influencers influence them. The pacing, character work and flying action was definitely consistent with that. I'll go back and give this one the in-depth treatment at some point, but it's an awesome match that never lets up. Virus is especially phenomenal and I'm glad he got the chance to go the distance. We're left with Satanico and Zumbido as the final two.
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Kendo Kashin is not at all the worst wrestler ever, but in terms of a talent gap between a wrestler and virtually everyone around him, the gap is probably bigger than anyone else I can think of.
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Honky may not have been a great in-ring performer in the WWF, but he had the resume before that in Memphis, where he took part in some very good traditional tag matches and wild brawls and held up his end very well. He had it in him, that's just not what he did on the national stage.
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How about Fred Ottman/Tugboat/Shockmaster/U.S. Steel?
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Taz is out to confront Taijiri. He praises him for a good match he just had and puts him over as a very talented guy. Taz says it would be his pleasure to give Taijiri a title shot anytime he wants. He's cut off by Steve Corino, flanked by Rhino and a wheelchair-bound Jack Victory. He wants Taz to admit his fear. Taz goes on a long, swearing tirade after Corino tells him to lay off. This is all a distraction for Taijiri to lay out Taz. Corino comes in the ring to taunt him. Why couldn't WCW create a similar dynamic with Jericho, Goldberg and Meng? Good angle.
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Bubba Ray has some problems with a fan and goes on quite the questionable tirade. He makes a few racist comments, then backtracks and apologizes for getting too racial. As Bubba Ray is preparing to insult him again, the fan throws a beer in his face. The Duds are ready to take the fan out when out of nowhere, Spike Dudley dives off the balcony on Bubba Ray and tries to fight both guys. You know how that will end. Balls Mahoney comes out with a chair. Both Dudleys take pretty hard shots to the head. I'm looking forward to the PPV match quite a bit.
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Kenny Bolin is back and says he can't be fired because Cornette has no jurisdiction over manager's licenses. That's a separate commission. Cornette confirms that's right - if there's a wrestler he wants to use that Kenny Bolin manages, they have to let him come in as long as he's licensed. But Bolin has no clients right now, so he's FIRED and OUTTA THERE!
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Wild studio brawl. Wolfie D looks great, and I like seeing him get a shot without Jamie Dundee. Randy Hales tries to calm things down and Doug Gilbert slugs him. This was great while it lasted and I wish it had more time. Hales orders a commercial so they can restore some order. Post-match, Wolfie D has words for Tommy Rich and does a great interview to hype that match, but is cut short as the show goes off the air.
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Randy Hales is on the phone telling someone there is absolutely no deal. Dave Brown asks if he can share what's going on and he says absolutely not, that there are so many things going on right now where he has no idea. Kevin Christian comes out quickly to make another match tonight - Randy Hales vs Doug Gilbert. The announcers yell at him, pointing out that Hales isn't even a wrestler and this is ridiculous. Crowd wants that one. Doug is out and is ecstatic about this one. Kevin Christian is the man. However, Doug turns the tide on him, saying he dislikes Christian even more than Kevin Christian. He threatens him to never doublecross him again.
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Kevin Christian claims that the only thing about wrestling that's fake is all of these guys who pretend to be friends and aren't. So he's making Wolfie D vs Tommy Rich tonight. Both come out to protest. Wolfie says they are good friends and people would rather see them team. Rich says it's not a good match because it's a mismatch, Rich is a former NWA champ and he slapped him around when they feuded in 1994-1995. Wolfie says he's a grown man now and they end up brawling. I like Kevin Christian as an instigator, with Cory Maclin yelling at him that this is all his fault. DWB and Doug Gilbert are out to break it up but they fail miserably. I guess a lot of these guys are loose cannons, but I wish they'd waited longer to pit them against each other.
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I've never even heard of Mighty Zulu. Is this a real wrestler that has had a long career with lots of matches on tape that people could see?
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I spent a few minutes trying to confirm that this was indeed Gran Naniwa because it's a completely different look. I still have no idea. Whoever it is, I didn't get into this one too much. Naniwa helping Tiger out of his jacket when he snuck attacked him kind of defeated the point of a sneak attack. They were doing the right things, but lacked conviction, so it felt like two guys just doing what they think is wrestling. Mike Lorefice sure thought it was good though.
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Pretty much any wrestler who has been around a decent amount of time will have something somewhere that's decent to good, no matter how bad they are. Beefcake being in a tag team with the awesome Greg Valentine is his something somewhere.
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He had good matches with Hogan? He wrestled Steamboat? When?
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After posting a performance bond, Doug Gilbert has been "100% reinstated" and can even be on TV. Memphis Mafia comes out so Hales decides to get out of dodge. Doug celebrates in the studio. Wolfie D's hubcap says "MY FINISH" on it - awesome! Dirty White Boy promises to get Dirty White Girl back tonight. Tommy Rich also hypes a barbed wire match. The Mafia may bleed, but BSK will sure bleed a lot more. Doug says he did not pay the performance bond and Dave says someone did. It turns out Rich did it.