subatomic_elbow

I just need to see Finn come out to Ghost, now.

1. I prefer Savage as a cocky face to Savage as a cocky heel. He's one of the few guys who was able to transition the part of his heel persona that fans reacted to over to his face character. 2. Flair is a heel. Always. Face Flair is a fever dream. 3. I feel like the Rock as Hollywood Rock was his best run, but he has sort of transcended heel/face, hasn't he? 4. Face Angle is killer, but goofy, white bread Angle is the best. 5. I barely remember heel Cactus. Face Mankind is more natural for Foley. 6. Shawn is always a heel. Every form of him is hatable. 7. Bret was always a face. 8. Face Bryan is a force of nature.

Chikara. I used to love it, but I had an epiphany. It is just like the show Lost. The more you invest in it, the more attention you give it, the worse it is. Every storyline falls apart. Nothing pays off. For every good to great wrestler, there's someone who is unwatchable. I mean, I have to stop watching when Dasher Hatfield or the Devastation Corporation are involved. Color guys who do schtick. Once again, Chikara. Kevin Kelly. I just hate him.

Maybe I'm naive, but I feel like 'Kicks ass and hangs out with Dean' Roman will get over in the long run. No heel turns for either, no gimmicks. Maybe change up his ring gear, make him look more like a person instead of a security guard? I find myself liking current Roman and wanting him to succeed.

After watching lots of early Horsemen footage this weekend, I noticed something. Roman Reigns is the only current WWE Superstar that I could see fitting right into a 4 Horsemen role. He's cocky, he's athletic, he can wear a suit. A Horseman should look and act like he's smarter, prettier, and more athletic than you, like he can fuck any girl in the room and win any fight. Roman could totally fit into that role, if they wanted to form a heel stable around him.

- I drove an hour and paid the premium for front row seats just so I could see the Young Bucks wrestle last week in Oswego, NY. I love their act and genuinely dig them as people. Just great guys. I didn't "get" them until I watched them wrestle another tag team with a similar gimmick: 2.0. Both were doing sort of meta indieriffic tag team gimmicks in Chikara. My sense of humor is very in line with the Simpsons episode "Cape Fear." Stepping on one rake is funny, stepping on 3 rakes is less funny, stepping on 37 rakes is hilarious. The Young Bucks hitting a dozen superkicks and yelling 'Suck It!' repeatedly throughout the match greatly amuses me. They take the gimmick too far and I dig that. 2.0 suck. - When I try to watch wrestling alone, I fall asleep. Always.

WWE House Show on Guam Hogan vs. DiBiase in the main, LOD vs. Natural Disasters for the tag belts. I remember Kerry Von Erich being there, too.

I thought it was a Yoshi Tonic.

I don't even know what to say.

As I recall, the 'WHAM!' was a derisive commentary on the amount of time between the kick and the stunner as Steve's body broke down. When he first broke out the Stunner, it was faster and more fluid. Post-neck operation, it was more of a kick, space, stunner.

The Fabulous Freebirds. 1983 or 84. I was a kid in Texas. They were cool as hell. I cheered them at home, not knowing I was on the wrong side. It continued when I moved to Virginia and started watching WCW. Bad guys in units watched each other's backs. They had fun. They made money. Why be Sting when you can join the goddamn 4 Horsemen?

No joke, I don't think I've ever paid attention to a Brody match. I've always thought he LOOKED like he would be awesome, but I've never been inspired to watch him. Sort of like Frank Zappa, actually.

I've always thought the Sting gimmick was one that could be passed on to a younger worker. I mean, why not?

Overrated: I think everything gets so deconstructed now that there's no sacred cows left. Underrated: Buddy Roberts is the best professional wrestler who ever lived. I see a lineage from him to Brian Pillman to Dean Ambrose. Hell, all three Freebirds are underrated.

If John Cena didn't exist, mankind would have been forced to invent one. The Jorts hold the true power. Whomever wore them would be king. If they had given the Jorts to anyone else, they would have ruled the Universe.

No contest: the Midnight Rider.

The light-headedness I'm feeling right now tells me that it has been a long stretch of years now that I've only watched PG wrestling and lost my tolerance for gore.

Orton is always kept near the top of the card because he is dependable. Hell, he's basically the poster boy and prototype for 'Modern WWE' style wrestling. Yes, he is boring, but he is solid enough in the ring. To me, he feels like a guy who would benefit from a complete rebuilding, but I don't think it is likely.

1. Sami Zayn- I'm always excited to see him on my TV. He makes everything more interesting. 2. Tyler Breeze- My favorite gimmick of the moment, perfectly executed. 3. Icarus- He improved a ton leading up to his match with Eddie Kingston that signaled the end of Chikara. Tonight, I get to see if he's going to continue that journey. 4. Luke Harper- Brutal, strange, and always entertaining. 5. Rusev- That look. That manager. THAT KICK.

Both describing Francine as 'anal hot' and Miss Elizabeth as 'Redbook' are more apt than my clumsy analogy. But yeah, Francine was porn star attractive, Beulah was girl next door attractive. Neither was my type, though. Molly Holly forever has my heart. ESPECIALLY shaved head Molly Holly.

When I was a teenager too young to buy porno mags for myself, in those pre-Internet days of the mid-90's, I would treasure Playboys. The women in Playboy were immaculate dream girls, unattainable fantasies. Sometimes, a Penthouse would be in the pile. The women of Penthouse were more attainable, more realistic. If a Playboy model was a 1 in a 1000 beauty, a Penthouse girl was like your buddy's college age sister or a friend of your mom's. These were women that weren't ugly by any stretch of the imagination but they were certainly not beautiful. Pretty sometimes, average usually, but attainable. There were times I just wanted a fantasy I could believe. I think this part of the modern obsession with amateur pornography. Miss Elizabeth was Playboy. Francine was Penthouse.

Little Naitch has been my favorite ref for awhile.

I love Brodus Clay's look. He looks like he would legit do bad things to you. Also, Rusev.

I have to say, Rebel looks like a good pickup for them. She has a different look than their other Knockouts and is very attractive. Do take my opinion on this with a grain of salt, I have a raging crush on ODB for some reason.

I have kind of fallen in love with Dean Ambrose: punch-drunk babyface in a way I never expected to. I can't put my finger on it, I just like watching him get beat up and cheering for, what I hope, is a win. It is a strange comparison, but he reminds me of old man Terry Funk in the best kind of way.