Death From Above

Happy go lucky Mick Foley and Bray Wyatt have to do a Special Christmas Greeting. This is my main demand.

I know nobody wants to hear this but would it really be a huge shock if this became AJ Styles? Jerry brought up why can't it be Ziggler. My first thought watching AJ take some impressive bumps in the Rumble while getting in bursts of his offense was that Ziggler is in trouble now. His gimmick is basically "guy that has good matches on TV" and AJ is better than him at pretty much everything that matters. I also like Tyler Breeze but his character needs a boost since coming up to the main roster. They've quickly turned him into something of a jobber, pretty much undeserved.

I remember as a kid really enjoying Yoko's early run where he had that gimmick for a while where no one could even knock him down and he just killed jobbers, that led into the Jim Duggan angle.

In terms of really old school guys Buddy Rogers has to be mentioned.

At the Royal Rumble, during the Owens/Ambrose match, Cole referred to being thrown into the crowd as "being thrown into the WWE Universe" more than once which tells me it's likely a production decree. I can't recall hearing him doing that regularly, but it was really weird and I am a bit hung up on it now. It makes it sound like a guy was thrown into a space anomaly.

Considering how much WCW contracts were shuffled between departments would it really be that surprising if the rights to music were equally obtuse to decipher? I could believe it.

On one hand I get why people look for logical reasons Triple H would dodge challengers. On the other hand I think we get into a bit of what I call "Breaking Down Cloverfield Logic" here. "Why don't they just drop the camera? Because then the movie would be over and that's boring. Do you really want that?" To play Devil's Advocate a little I think Triple H is hoping that Lesnar, Reigns, and Ambrose basically destroy each other, leaving him in a better position.

I mean... it puts Big E in the spotlight, so that's good? Even if it is as a stooge.

I actually missed the first hour of RAW altogether which probably explains why I still have the energy left to pretend to care about this main event.

That was all the things about Rock that are bad yet was still whoeheartedly entertaining. That's his paradox, but fuck it, you just have to roll with it. Also him shooting and putting the costume guys on camera is worth it just because it probably made Kevin Dunn shit himself.

The Golden Truth

Jericho's timing was pretty bad, but I'll cut him a little slack in that it's not like him and AJ have worked before. This is me being nice. His spot calling was something else. Never mind a 20 year vet nearly blowing a rollup finish.

It's not even at one point they've wanted to love Roman but at multiple points. When he crushed Triple H the crowd was 100% with it. When he superman punched Vince McMahon people were 100% with it. They just don't seem to know how to follow up those moments because they have this ass backwards logic about keeping (only certain) heels strong.

Post-Rumble at least now we can make a few predictions with a bit of clarity. Roman Reigns vs. Triple H - Masters of the Universe Galactic Championship Bray Wyatt vs. Brock Lesnar - I think I am the one man on the internet that wants to see this? Okay. Gimmicks Ahoy Match, I'm fine. Owens vs. Ambrose vs. Sheamus vs. Styles - Elimination match for the Intercontinental Championship (please baby wrestling Jesus not a fatal fourway) Sasha Banks vs. Becky Lynch vs. Charlotte - Three way Divas title match Usos vs. New Day - Tag titles, the endless feud, New Day loses the belts finally. I have no idea where the tag division goes from there. I think all of these have a fairly reasonable chance of happening. Rusev still needs a match. Del Rio I assume is in a US title match but I'm not sure with who. It just seems unlikely they have the Kalisto feud go that long. Undertaker has to do... something. Shit, I'd be totally down for Rusev/Taker even if it means absolutely nothing. You'll have a memorial battle royal. Jericho has to be in here somewhere. Don't forget it's Wrestlemania so you also have like minimum an hour of segments that are just people jabbering.

In fairness, he failed at doing so. He definitely looked smaller than Jericho. Which is good, because Jericho looks like an aging pro wrestler and Styles looks like an actual athletic person.

He was great tonight, doing the kind of stuff he doesn't get to do much. And honestly if anything he gains something by going toe to toe with Triple H even if he lost, because I don't think anyone actually expects him to win that battle in The WWE Universe©.

This isn't a shot at you personally in any way, more of a generalization, but I honestly have no idea how a man can be around your age and not have a connection to some of the New Day's source material. It literally makes no sense that a male wrestling fan in their 30's on the internet wouldn't get and enjoy something about New Day's gimmick.

completely agree with this. Reigns beating Hunter at mania will mean nothing I agree, though it's not like Hunter as the bathroom break slot at Mania is new. Shit, he had that terrible match with Brock.

I think you are underestimating how powerful the mere name of Wrestlemania is as a pop culture brand that extends way further than anything else in wrestling. Granted, I could be proven wrong. But I honestly believe some people are underestimating how powerful "Come be part of THE BIGGEST WRESTLEMANIA EVER" will prove to be as a marketing tool pretty much regardless of the card.

No surprise for the finish but I did like that it came down to HHH and Ambrose, and not Roman at least. A really fun Rumble overall. I enjoyed this show a lot. I'm not huge on the finish BUT I cannot name a single finish I'd have been huge on, so that's par. The rest of it was a lot of fun.

No surprise for the finish but I did like that it came down to HHH and Ambrose, and not Roman at least. A really fun Rumble overall. I enjoyed this show a lot.

Completely baffled by the Wyatts hate. Is this more of that smart mark nonsense where clean wrestling isn't a gimmick but gimmicks are gimmicks and so it sucks?

Jesus Christ, Brock clubbing Strowman in the face had to be seen to be believed.

This might be just me but booking the Royal Rumble and the return of X-Files head to head is a nerd crime.

I'm totally fine with AJ/Owens and you should be too. This is fine. And what a great Rumble Red Herring that was.